By Andy Doan
AndyCat
July 28, 2005
You will never know what it's like to be the only kid with black hair and
slanted eyes in your kindergarten class.
You will never know what it's like to be called Chinky Chinaman on the
playground at 5 years old.
You will never know what it's like to ask your 1st grade teacher about
Vietnam.
Only to have her tell you that all humans are created equal.
(Please.)
You will never know how dehumanizing it feels when your grade school friends
ask if you can see when you laugh.
You will never know what it feels like when those same grade school friends
tell you that all Asian People are rich.
You will never know what it feels like to see your cousin, aunt, and uncle
immigrate to this country and try to survive off welfare.
You will never know what it feels like to want to be something more than just
the "Asian Kid."
You will never know what it feels like to be told that, "you don't even
act Asian."
You will never know what it feels like to be stigmatized as the model
minority.
You will never know what it feels like when somebody asks you while standing
in the buffet line, "Do Japanese people like gravy?".
You will never know what it feels like to be held at gunpoint by Asian Gang
Members.
You will never know what racial harassment feels like as you get pulled over
by cops and get accused of being part of the Asian Mafia.
(Asian Mafia? Oh that's right, they're upstairs in the Chinatown restaurant.
Just like Rush Hour.)
You will never know the true meaning of identity crisis.
You will never know what it feels like to be plagued by the small dick Asian
Man rumor.
You will never know what it feels like to have this desire to whip it out on
stage and say, "Ha! We are gigantic!"
You think you know.
But you have no idea.